i need to get a real job so i can stop crying over expensive lingerie and start crying in expensive lingerie
perks of being my girlfriend
1) I will buy you hella cute lingerie
2) You are welcome to model said lingerie for me, preferably while sitting in my lap
3) I will bake you cookies and make you pizza and we can cuddle and watch netflix stuff
4) I’ll take you on boring dates like to farmer’s markets and farms and hiking but i will try to spice things up a bit and probably eat you out on a boulder in the forest so yeah
5) We can have cute sleepovers like every night and i will paint your nails and do your makeup and play with your hair and we will stay up late and talk about life and space and feminism and basically anything you want
6) When you’re on your period, I will take baths with you and take care of you and feed you chocolate and cuddle you if you cry and omg
7) I’ll text you funny selfies and songs that i want you to listen to and stuff that makes me think of you
8) I’ll play goofy games with you and take you shopping and take you to the movies and wine and dine you every single fucking night if that’s what you want
9) We can raise plants together and lots of puppies and kittens
10) Okay i’m really sad now and i want a girlfriend
Oh GOD NO. What the fuck is this list? Desperate and gross and PLEASE FIND A SOMEONE WITH SUBSTANCE. Dude these aren’t perks. PERKS. Generalized decency being called PERKS. The fuck, man!
1. You don’t gotta buy shit
2. Fuck off
3. I can do all that myself
4. How would any of that be boring?! That’s all awesome crap. Do what you want, I’ll see you on top of the mountain.
5. Nobody likes a brown noser, that and you can’t replace friends
6. Gross
7. I guess that ones okay
8. No thanks. Not all girls date for money - again, better to choose a quality girl
9. I feel like you mean for this to be a practice round. I’m not a zookeeper.
10. FUCK OFF YOU NEED A GF, HOW ABOUT YOU LEARN TO BE YOUR OWN PERSON FIRST INSTEAD OF BROADCASTING THIS SHITTY LIST.
why do people get so fucking upset that i want to do cute stuff for someone, i am my own person, i’m very secure and i want to take care of and spoil my girlfriend, and that’s not me saying that ALL girls need to be taken care of and spoiled to feel loved, because that’s not true, that just some of the ways i would like to show my love for her…would you rather have a list of all the shitty things i would to to my girlfriend because that would definitely show that i care about myself only and am my own person and don’t give a shit about anyone else, is that what you’re looking for? i’m sorry if this list offends you for something so fucking stupid, but please, don’t reblog my posts and keep your shitty ass comments to yourself because nobody cares and nobody asked for them
I thought they were really cute, what girl wouldnt someone to show them how much they love them and those were obviously how you would show affection in your own way that person is just awful im so sorry keep being adorable
“dress for the job you want not the job you have”
*shows up at law firm in lingerie and angel wings*
Portrait mode was created for my cat. #magicalmistermistoffelees (at Glen Burnie, Maryland)
https://www.instagram.com/p/Box11btHA4ky7Tslrt_zf1wxMSYRRLtOKRRO8k0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=11we7wh9xfxp1
I am the girl who prefers to spend her Friday night curled up with her pillow, reading a good novel, and I am also the girl who likes to go out on a Saturday night and dance until the DJ plays his last song. I am the girl who wants to wear beat up converses and an oversized sweatshirt, and I am also the girl who who owns over sixty dresses and too many shoes to count. Why did it become okay to say one is better than the other? Because I am all of that.
straightcircle96